EPISODE 1: OVER COFFEE
I woke up in the middle of the night in some MAD SWEATS...like face wet, legs hot as can be....the post nightmare type of sweats.
and I didn't really know why. I laid there for awhile attempting to calm myself back down but I was all worked up for some reason. I have never had a lot of anxiety. But recently, I have just been worrying.
I am going to try and break this down, my thoughts, but it may make NO sense whatsoever.
I AM LOST. I AM SCARED AND I AM OVERWHELMED. Overwhelmed that I just finished the first semester of junior year of college and I don't really know what I want to do in life. Overwhelmed that I have many unopened emails and voicemails. Overwhelmed that there are other aspects of life that need attention like friends, family and relationships. Side Note: Overwhelmed that I have a lost UPS package and finding someone to talk to on the phone is nothing less than a miracle.
Sometimes the issue with Instagram and social media, is that it all looks so "perfect." It all looks so effortless and magazine ready but it totally 100% isn't. It totally 100% isn't all coffee dates and blue jeans with perfectly picked flowers on the side. It totally 100% isn't photoshoots daily, avocado toast posts and bedtime at 9:00 pm with a cup of tea and hot man next to you. It's messy and loud and busy as heck. It's noisy.
and everyday, I'm still trying to figure it out. I wake up and look myself in my slightly dirty mirror and say I'VE GOT THIS...whether I do or not.
Cancel the Noise. You've got this.